Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Day 2 - I was only thinking of you!

Yesterday was a day full of emotions. Tears, anger, hurt, fear and any other feeling in between rolled into one. For the first time in my new relationship, I was tested I guess you could say. I was faced with the possibility of choosing between my own happiness and the happiness of someone else.

A person I deeply care about was offered a better opportunity that would have caused him to move away to another city. I'm not gonna lie, when I found this out, there was a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach that just felt horrible. I was faced with the fact that I might lose one of the few people that I care deeply about. But rather than being selfish and thinking about my feelings, I pushed that aside and thought about the benefits that it would be for my dear friend and love. Which in turn turned out to be a mistake because when that was brought to his attention, all hell broke lose literally, *Enter all the feelings mentioned in the 2nd line of this post*

Now his argument was that I was making too much out of nothing. "Blowing things out of proportion" those were the words that he used. That I wasn't thinking of his feelings and what he wanted. I was even accused of using this situation as an excuse to end our relationship, I'm not gonna lie that one really hurt. But you see, it wasn't that. If I had my way, in a utopian universe if such a place existed, I would want this person with me every single day, day and night! This person has no idea, or at least he didn't at the time, how much he and the time that he spends with me mean to me. I was only thinking of him and his happiness. And if that happiness meant me having to let go of him, I was willing to make that sacrifice.

Which brings me to the point of this post. Remember there is always a point. Was I wrong in my thinking? Isn't it true that when you love someone so much, you should be willing to sacrifice your own happiness for theirs? That's how I've always felt because I know that if the situation were reverse, I would expect the same thing from that other person. To me, this whole situation that I went through yesterday relates to that famous saying "It's better to have lost at love, then never to have loved at all". Anyway, that's what was on my mind today...

Quick side note: It was appreciated that certain people helped me out yesterday in more ways than one. Oh and things were settled with this person. To you my dear sweet love, I love you more than you will ever know :)

1 comment:

  1. I know im going to have to face this one day so i completely understand your thinking but i prefer to think of this quote, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was." Even tho he didnt leave he knew he could have and he is yours thats why you still have him. In the end some happiness is not worth the sacrifice. im glad it worked out for you! I knew it would.