Thursday, March 25, 2010
An emptiness
That hole that I have in my heart seems like it will never close. I find myself missing my mom more and more lately. Not sure if it's the Easter season, mom was very festive during this time of year, or if it's cause I know that that day is coming closer and closer to when I lost her. I wake up each day thinking that it will be good. Then those moments where I find that I'm not doing anything creep up on me and my mind starts to wander. I love to think about my mom but then the heartache begins and I begin to regret letting myself think about her. I know that this pain will always be here, I just wish that it would get easier instead of harder. If it weren't for certain people in my life, I have no idea what I'd do. This was gonna go in my private blog but I decided to post it on my public one. I feel a little better after writing this :)
Sunday, January 31, 2010
OMG, has it been that long!
Hello amigas and amigos!
Well it has been awhile since I've blogged. And not that nothing has been going on, but I've gotten lazy. Not good! So I'm going to make a promise to myself, 3 blogs a week! Or at least 1, haaha!
Relationship wise - Things are going well with R2 and I, yay! Granted our last dramatic outfall was a couple of weeks ago, but prior to that it was last back in November. So tht's a good thing. I like where we are right now, that's all tht matters :)
Family wise - Blah! That's another story. Those tht are close to me know that I hve a story with a particular relative tht I bunt heads with. Well tht's not going so well so stay tuned to future blogs about how she continues to torture me.
Friends - I never got a chance to express my thanks and gratitude for some very special people that have come into my life this past year through the online community. These people have brightened my day in more ways than one and hve been there at my lowest. I know tht they may not realize this, but there were times when I got a txt, card, e-mail, IM or phone call at the perfect time to lift me up. I love all my friends and am thankful for each and every one of them, but I want to make a special recognition to Angie (MG), Carlos and Grey (who needs to get a blog going!!) for being some of the dearest friends anyone could ask for :)
And with that, here's hoping tht everyone id hving a good year so far. 11 more months to go til 2011, haaha!
Well it has been awhile since I've blogged. And not that nothing has been going on, but I've gotten lazy. Not good! So I'm going to make a promise to myself, 3 blogs a week! Or at least 1, haaha!
Relationship wise - Things are going well with R2 and I, yay! Granted our last dramatic outfall was a couple of weeks ago, but prior to that it was last back in November. So tht's a good thing. I like where we are right now, that's all tht matters :)
Family wise - Blah! That's another story. Those tht are close to me know that I hve a story with a particular relative tht I bunt heads with. Well tht's not going so well so stay tuned to future blogs about how she continues to torture me.
Friends - I never got a chance to express my thanks and gratitude for some very special people that have come into my life this past year through the online community. These people have brightened my day in more ways than one and hve been there at my lowest. I know tht they may not realize this, but there were times when I got a txt, card, e-mail, IM or phone call at the perfect time to lift me up. I love all my friends and am thankful for each and every one of them, but I want to make a special recognition to Angie (MG), Carlos and Grey (who needs to get a blog going!!) for being some of the dearest friends anyone could ask for :)
And with that, here's hoping tht everyone id hving a good year so far. 11 more months to go til 2011, haaha!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
It's been awhile, damn insomnia is back!
Wow, it's been awhile since I've blogged. I need to make a habit of at least posting 2 times a week.
So what's been up? I've been struggling lately with sleeping. Yes, the insomnia is slowly coming back. But it's not as bad as it was the first time. My first round of insomnia I was only getting 10 to 15 minute naps day or night throughout the day and night. 30 mins if I was lucky. This time around, It's anywhere from 2 to 4 hrs. 5 if I'm real lucky.
How do i deal with this problem? Many people are telling me that I need to get on some kind of medication to sleep. My answer,um....no thanks. I did it on my own the first time, I'll be able to do it again. I don't want to be one of those people that depend on pills. Am I wrong in thinking that way? Maybe it's just me. I've been able to do it thus far, I'll be ok.
I often wonder how I'd be though if I didn't have some of the people in my life that I have right now? And I'm not only talking about people that I have physically with me, but people that I've met through twitter. I never thought I'd make some real connections that I've made with some people on twiter. I am grateful for them everyday. Some of them have no idea how much they've helped me in times of need.
So in conclusion, insomnia is back (yay, not), very grateful for my love and best friends here in SA and very grateful for my wonderful, beautiful twitter friends (Have no idea what I'd do w/o them, especially in the middle of the night).
So what's been up? I've been struggling lately with sleeping. Yes, the insomnia is slowly coming back. But it's not as bad as it was the first time. My first round of insomnia I was only getting 10 to 15 minute naps day or night throughout the day and night. 30 mins if I was lucky. This time around, It's anywhere from 2 to 4 hrs. 5 if I'm real lucky.
How do i deal with this problem? Many people are telling me that I need to get on some kind of medication to sleep. My answer,um....no thanks. I did it on my own the first time, I'll be able to do it again. I don't want to be one of those people that depend on pills. Am I wrong in thinking that way? Maybe it's just me. I've been able to do it thus far, I'll be ok.
I often wonder how I'd be though if I didn't have some of the people in my life that I have right now? And I'm not only talking about people that I have physically with me, but people that I've met through twitter. I never thought I'd make some real connections that I've made with some people on twiter. I am grateful for them everyday. Some of them have no idea how much they've helped me in times of need.
So in conclusion, insomnia is back (yay, not), very grateful for my love and best friends here in SA and very grateful for my wonderful, beautiful twitter friends (Have no idea what I'd do w/o them, especially in the middle of the night).
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
My First Kiss!
So the other night I was talking to one of my close friends. We were having one of our usual conversations talking about whatever, you know just random things. Within our conversation the subject of her first kiss came up which got me to thinking of my first kiss. It was a rather awkward situation and I thought it would be funny to blog about it.
Now before anything, I need to make clear that I've always been in a private school. Catholic school all my life except when we were oversees in Europe. I point this out because in High School I went to an all girls Catholic school and always hung out in groups, so I never really was exposed to the whole dating boys thing til I got to college where it was there that I experienced my first real kiss. Sad to say, it wasn't R2 haha!
I'll never forget this young man who gave me my first kiss. His name was Sal and he was a very good friend. At least he was til he kissed me, lol. Perhaps I should explain. This guy was one of my first friends in college. We had like 3 classes together. He was a good buddy. We would see each other every now and then and talk like regular friends do. One day he saw me in the library and we started talking. We both still had quite some time before our next class would start and he asked if I wanted to go back to his dorm room to watch a movie. I thought sure, that would be cool. So we go to his dorm room and he turns on the tv. He sat next to me on the couch and that's where it all began...
When he sat next to me, he seemed kind of fidgety like he was nervous or something. He started talking to me and kept like gazing into my eyes. Haha, it's so funny now because at the time, I had no idea what gazing into someones eyes was. Then it happened, he lightly brushed a finger across my cheek and then leaned in and kissed me. It was the funniest thing because I completely froze! I kept thinking to myself, "What are you doing, you're my friend"?! I kissed him back, but it was weird to me cause I really had no idea what the hell I was doing. After it was over, it was real quiet and suddenly sitting next to him felt real weird. I made up some excuse about having to leave cause I was working on a paper. Well needless to say, I'm sure that he didn't get the reaction he was expecting because after that day, he never spoke to me again. And it wasn't a bad thing, it was more like he tried to avoid me as much as possible and I him. We saw each other about 2 years later and the meeting was kind of awkward at first but then everything sort of fell into place and we talked regularly like nothing had happened. Funny thing is that to this day, neither one of us has ever mentioned that day.
Well, that's my story of my first kiss. I'm happy that this friendship was able to resolve itself. Maybe one day I'll have the courage to tell my friend Sal that he gave me my first kiss. He'll always hold a special place in my heart :)
Now before anything, I need to make clear that I've always been in a private school. Catholic school all my life except when we were oversees in Europe. I point this out because in High School I went to an all girls Catholic school and always hung out in groups, so I never really was exposed to the whole dating boys thing til I got to college where it was there that I experienced my first real kiss. Sad to say, it wasn't R2 haha!
I'll never forget this young man who gave me my first kiss. His name was Sal and he was a very good friend. At least he was til he kissed me, lol. Perhaps I should explain. This guy was one of my first friends in college. We had like 3 classes together. He was a good buddy. We would see each other every now and then and talk like regular friends do. One day he saw me in the library and we started talking. We both still had quite some time before our next class would start and he asked if I wanted to go back to his dorm room to watch a movie. I thought sure, that would be cool. So we go to his dorm room and he turns on the tv. He sat next to me on the couch and that's where it all began...
When he sat next to me, he seemed kind of fidgety like he was nervous or something. He started talking to me and kept like gazing into my eyes. Haha, it's so funny now because at the time, I had no idea what gazing into someones eyes was. Then it happened, he lightly brushed a finger across my cheek and then leaned in and kissed me. It was the funniest thing because I completely froze! I kept thinking to myself, "What are you doing, you're my friend"?! I kissed him back, but it was weird to me cause I really had no idea what the hell I was doing. After it was over, it was real quiet and suddenly sitting next to him felt real weird. I made up some excuse about having to leave cause I was working on a paper. Well needless to say, I'm sure that he didn't get the reaction he was expecting because after that day, he never spoke to me again. And it wasn't a bad thing, it was more like he tried to avoid me as much as possible and I him. We saw each other about 2 years later and the meeting was kind of awkward at first but then everything sort of fell into place and we talked regularly like nothing had happened. Funny thing is that to this day, neither one of us has ever mentioned that day.
Well, that's my story of my first kiss. I'm happy that this friendship was able to resolve itself. Maybe one day I'll have the courage to tell my friend Sal that he gave me my first kiss. He'll always hold a special place in my heart :)
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Day 6 - My Favorite Tweets!
Every now and then, there is a tweet or two that catches my attention that I have no choice but to add to my favorites. Here are just a few and why they're my faves!
@shaycarl The Damn internet needs to have a closing time so I can go to sleep. "Thanks for surfing the web but we are currently closed! Come again" ;)
Have we not all felt this way at one time or another! The internet can be too addictiong at times...
@itsBrent [Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today.]
I just liked this! Very inspiring. Not sure if Brent came up with it but still! :)
@TonyaTko My dad just came by with his toolbox & saved the day! Thank goodness for Daddies...& even more for The "Daddy's Girls" who love & need them!
I can relate to this tweet on so many levels, I'm a daddy's girl too!
@itsBrent Donuts and Guns. Welcome to Texas. http://twitpic.com/ohhf
It's a TX tweet! Had to go in the faves! Copy and paste the link to view the pic, very funny!
@CharlesTrippy I wish they made Head & Shoulders for flaky people in real life and not just flaky hair. LOL.
I thought this was funny!
@MrsGinobili Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, & never regret anything that made you smile.
Words to live by! Gotta love MG :)
@rattlergrl @iamgrey @MrsGinobili @illegalvenez @Rose_Flores Secret coven meeting must be held! We seem to have been put up for discussion? Haha!
I thought this was funny cause seems like everyone wants to be part of our coven. No more members!! HAHAHA!!
@Rose_Flores Ooo they're playing Closer by NIN. Yeah i'm talking to you hahaha ;-)
Pfft! No explanation right Rose?! HAHA!
@carlos_vnzla #1 @rattlergrl @Rose_Flores 262... i SMurfing love you girls :) #2 @Rose_Flores @rattlergrl who cares what tweeple think... the coven is what matters!
Tweets from one of the times Carlos was a little tipsy! lol
@carlos_vnzla #1@rose_flores @rattlergrl U MEMBER.... *sigh* cus recently i was all *sigh*#2@Rose_Flores @rattlergrl lol... i cant show you'll my tweets and blips right now! people will see
Haha, inside jokes with Carlos and Rose!
@Rose_Flores Just passed a street called Rattler Lane. Thought of RG and R2G2! Going too fast to take a pic though lol
Aww, R1G1 and R2G2 :)
@buckhollywood I love that all the major news networks are asking us to tweet our thoughts about Michael Jackson! Everyone is a Twitter WHORE! :-)
We are all twitter whores, don't deny it! Hahaha!
@slimshadym1 #1@rattlergrl hey go to BED..JST SAY NO..lol!! #2@rattlergrl u too..STOP TWEETING..U NEED #TWEHAB!!lol
The night I realized I had a twitter addiction! Hahaha!
@iamgrey http://blip.fm/~9o0y4 For people who just need to say...and those who want to hear...
This was on a day tht R2 was in Dallas the first time he left. We thank Grey everyday for this song. It's become a very special song to the Rattlers :)
@rattlerguy @rattlergrl What up buttercup! LOL Got 20 mins...
Just thought it was cute :)
@AguyfrTX #1@rattlergrl @rattlerguy And yes i am druk, who gives a F---! I left out the n on purpose so it could rhyme LMAO! BOOSH! #2 Jsut got in, am reelly wasted, and am in 2 truthful of a mood! No tweets 2nite! Well maybez a few LOL Cinder!! Sent you a DM not an MD HAHA! #3 I'm no longer drunk, I am now wasted! LMAO Peace out!
Had to include Matt's tipsy tweets. He's a fun drunkie :)
@Drunk_Bot RT @MrsGinobili @slimshadym1 @rattlergrl omg @jwinfrmsa was stalking us, he totally loves me! =) lmao ok ill stop now im drunk!! - http: ...
Had to add one of our drunk_bot ones! Hahaha!
So these are only a few of my favorite tweets! I have so many! When I'm kinda bummed or just feel like laughing, I go back and read my faves, have a good laugh and then feel much better! I love all my twitter friends. I thank them all!
@shaycarl The Damn internet needs to have a closing time so I can go to sleep. "Thanks for surfing the web but we are currently closed! Come again" ;)
Have we not all felt this way at one time or another! The internet can be too addictiong at times...
@itsBrent [Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today.]
I just liked this! Very inspiring. Not sure if Brent came up with it but still! :)
@TonyaTko My dad just came by with his toolbox & saved the day! Thank goodness for Daddies...& even more for The "Daddy's Girls" who love & need them!
I can relate to this tweet on so many levels, I'm a daddy's girl too!
@itsBrent Donuts and Guns. Welcome to Texas. http://twitpic.com/ohhf
It's a TX tweet! Had to go in the faves! Copy and paste the link to view the pic, very funny!
@CharlesTrippy I wish they made Head & Shoulders for flaky people in real life and not just flaky hair. LOL.
I thought this was funny!
@MrsGinobili Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, & never regret anything that made you smile.
Words to live by! Gotta love MG :)
@rattlergrl @iamgrey @MrsGinobili @illegalvenez @Rose_Flores Secret coven meeting must be held! We seem to have been put up for discussion? Haha!
I thought this was funny cause seems like everyone wants to be part of our coven. No more members!! HAHAHA!!
@Rose_Flores Ooo they're playing Closer by NIN. Yeah i'm talking to you hahaha ;-)
Pfft! No explanation right Rose?! HAHA!
@carlos_vnzla #1 @rattlergrl @Rose_Flores 262... i SMurfing love you girls :) #2 @Rose_Flores @rattlergrl who cares what tweeple think... the coven is what matters!
Tweets from one of the times Carlos was a little tipsy! lol
@carlos_vnzla #1@rose_flores @rattlergrl U MEMBER.... *sigh* cus recently i was all *sigh*#2@Rose_Flores @rattlergrl lol... i cant show you'll my tweets and blips right now! people will see
Haha, inside jokes with Carlos and Rose!
@Rose_Flores Just passed a street called Rattler Lane. Thought of RG and R2G2! Going too fast to take a pic though lol
Aww, R1G1 and R2G2 :)
@buckhollywood I love that all the major news networks are asking us to tweet our thoughts about Michael Jackson! Everyone is a Twitter WHORE! :-)
We are all twitter whores, don't deny it! Hahaha!
@slimshadym1 #1@rattlergrl hey go to BED..JST SAY NO..lol!! #2@rattlergrl u too..STOP TWEETING..U NEED #TWEHAB!!lol
The night I realized I had a twitter addiction! Hahaha!
@iamgrey http://blip.fm/~9o0y4 For people who just need to say...and those who want to hear...
This was on a day tht R2 was in Dallas the first time he left. We thank Grey everyday for this song. It's become a very special song to the Rattlers :)
@rattlerguy @rattlergrl What up buttercup! LOL Got 20 mins...
Just thought it was cute :)
@AguyfrTX #1@rattlergrl @rattlerguy And yes i am druk, who gives a F---! I left out the n on purpose so it could rhyme LMAO! BOOSH! #2 Jsut got in, am reelly wasted, and am in 2 truthful of a mood! No tweets 2nite! Well maybez a few LOL Cinder!! Sent you a DM not an MD HAHA! #3 I'm no longer drunk, I am now wasted! LMAO Peace out!
Had to include Matt's tipsy tweets. He's a fun drunkie :)
@Drunk_Bot RT @MrsGinobili @slimshadym1 @rattlergrl omg @jwinfrmsa was stalking us, he totally loves me! =) lmao ok ill stop now im drunk!! - http: ...
Had to add one of our drunk_bot ones! Hahaha!
So these are only a few of my favorite tweets! I have so many! When I'm kinda bummed or just feel like laughing, I go back and read my faves, have a good laugh and then feel much better! I love all my twitter friends. I thank them all!
Friday, August 28, 2009
Day 5 - What I did today!
Really couldn't decided what to pick out of my day for today's blog so I decided to do something a little different. Gonna write about my whole day instead of a specific topic with a point! That's right, no moral point today, just a day in the life of sort of thing, lol. Anyway, my day was divided into 2 parts, the first half belonged to my dad the second half belonged to love, otherwise known as R2.
My day started with breakfast with my dad. My dad is normally off on Friday's from work, so it has become a normal routine of spending time together bonding. The day normally starts off by us eating breakfast together. And it's either Denny's, IHOP or today's choice, McDonald's. I enjoy this time, cause it allows me to spend time with my dad. Usually after breakfast, if it isn't checking out estate sales, we will go and visit antique shops or spend some time and catch a movie with my fave aunt. Today after breakfast, we decided to check out some estate sales. My dad likes going to those and honestly, so do I. There are 4 companies whose mailing lists we are on and luckily, 2 of them were having sales today. My first half of the day was fun.
R2 and myself wanted to see the new Final Destination movie cause it was gonna be in 3D. It's been awhile since I've seen a 3D movie, so I was really looking forward to it. Overall, the movie was the typical storyline, nothing new but boy the 3D effects were awesome. That alone made the movie worth seeing. After the movie we came back to my house and had lunch with my dad from Subway. It was a fun afternoon.
In the evening, I found myself at R2's place this time watching the Ranger game with a couple of friends. Ranger's lost :( After the game, R2 and I decided to go downstairs and walk the Riverwalk. That's something that we enjoy doing. We spent some time at Durty Nellie's Irish pub (one of our hangouts) and then he took me home.
So that was my Friday. Spent it with the 2 most important men in my life my dad and my R2 :)
My day started with breakfast with my dad. My dad is normally off on Friday's from work, so it has become a normal routine of spending time together bonding. The day normally starts off by us eating breakfast together. And it's either Denny's, IHOP or today's choice, McDonald's. I enjoy this time, cause it allows me to spend time with my dad. Usually after breakfast, if it isn't checking out estate sales, we will go and visit antique shops or spend some time and catch a movie with my fave aunt. Today after breakfast, we decided to check out some estate sales. My dad likes going to those and honestly, so do I. There are 4 companies whose mailing lists we are on and luckily, 2 of them were having sales today. My first half of the day was fun.
R2 and myself wanted to see the new Final Destination movie cause it was gonna be in 3D. It's been awhile since I've seen a 3D movie, so I was really looking forward to it. Overall, the movie was the typical storyline, nothing new but boy the 3D effects were awesome. That alone made the movie worth seeing. After the movie we came back to my house and had lunch with my dad from Subway. It was a fun afternoon.
In the evening, I found myself at R2's place this time watching the Ranger game with a couple of friends. Ranger's lost :( After the game, R2 and I decided to go downstairs and walk the Riverwalk. That's something that we enjoy doing. We spent some time at Durty Nellie's Irish pub (one of our hangouts) and then he took me home.
So that was my Friday. Spent it with the 2 most important men in my life my dad and my R2 :)
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